amazingadrian

Today felt absolutely surreal.  I want to beleive it never happened, that I didn't lose an entire day of my life over this.

So, I have this friend in the community, and he seems like a pretty decent guy, right?  Except he has issues. Not with me, but with other people.  I can't say I didn't see this coming. Up until recently, it was all nice and quiet behind the scenes, but when I saw a breif glimpse of it come out a few months ago, I knew in the back of my mind that he wouldn't get over it. It just wasn't consistant with his personality to do so.

So yesterday, it all came to a head. My friend was kicked out of the community.  The current duration is for a year.  He's my freind though, so I chat with him about it, try to find out what's going on, see if there's anything I can do to help. Only..I'm talking with my other friends now, getting their side of the story, and I see just how badly he transgressed, just how far he overstepped those lines that should have been stayed well behind. And suddenly, I'm not so sure if I can help him. I try to think up ways to distract him from the catalysts, but my ideas prove hollow and stupid once I gave them some thought.  So he brought it on himself. And he recognizes this.  And there's nothing I can do that will make things go back to even a semblance of the way they were.

He hurt my friends. I don't think such was his intention. I know he got ahead of himself, and said and done things that never should have been said and done to anyone, especially not those you're tying to be friends with. He alienated a lot of folks. His own best friend blocked him, which is a testament to how bad it was.  But I know he still has a few friends in the community. People like me who won't turn their backs on him until he's screwed up every last chance that he's given.  He's a nice guy when he isn't being a dick. I know a lot of you think that's just a manipulative face he puts on, but I've watched him long enough to know that he isn't capable of such  a machivelian charade. He's too hardheaded and egotistical to pull that off knowingly for as long as he's been coming here.  On the other hand, I know he's going to try and make things sound like apple pie and deflect the blame. It's human to do so.

So I sat down with him and told him "Look, you fucked up. I tried to think of ways I could help you, but I really honestly couldn't come up with anything that wouldn't either A) gloss over the real problem you have, or B) fuck things up worse or put me in a bad situation. You need to take this as the clarion call that it is and cleanup your act with how you socially behave around certain people, because right now it's just not acceptible." He agreed with my points and we spoke at length.  I just hope he listens to me because I'm pretty much the last chance he's got. His former best friend agrees with me on that point.  The ball is his to do what he will with now.


City of Heroes...I picked up a timecard today. I sort of regret it, because it set me back more than buying the actual game would have costed. You can buy COX for $9-$10 these days.  The damn timecards cost $30 bucks.  I don't know about you, but I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around how time to play a game can retail for more than the actual game itself. Especially when you have to purchase a timecard to play the game out of the box?  The short of it is, there is no way I can afford to regularly stock both games. I'll have to decide wether I want to play one or the other, and I was really really hoping that it wouldn't come down to my having to make that decision.  Still, I'm grateful to skunktaur for giving me the chance to at least experience some of it. Even though nobody offered to take his buddy code aside from me, I'm sure there were a number of people he could have chosen to offer it to.

So last night I participated in an rp run by thdrgngrl.  And I bombed it. Terribly.  I feel like a real jerk now, because she wasn't all that confident in her skills as a GM, and my rping seems to have ruined it for others.


So..thdrgngrl? I'm sorry.  You were a great GM.  In the future, I'll have to approach rps like this with a bit more caution and a bit more conformity.

Ok, so it seems the person I was talking to the other night really did have a heart attack. He got back to me from a laptop in the hospital, after his AIM screenname at home had been running for a full 24 hours. (he left it running when he went to the emergency room last night).  I guess it's a good thing I was able to recognize some of his symptoms and google the rest for him. He'll be laid up in the hospital for a week to recover, so I guess he's all right.  Kind of scary though, nontheless.

So..hm. I don't know wether or not I want to attempt getting back into The Napping Cat's Dream forums. I tried it once about two years ago and it didn't work out, but i hear things have calmed down a bit and there aren't so many people running around willy-nilly over there any more. I've got two character concepts I'm thinking about using, though can't really decide which (if either) to use.  Forum rps are nice and slow, so I'm pretty sure I can take on several at once, but I still worry about overextending myself. I don't know why. (The X-men rp forums I'm trying out were way slower than they first appeared. I don't know if this is because I'm new and everyone's scared of me, or what. If things remain that way, I can definately do another forum; but we'll have to wait and see what happens once I get some assistance getting my canon moving. Diddly squat is happening with my OC, so it may not be the place for him.)

Not much else to do except wonder why life is so crazy sometimes.

Wow, what a day today has been. I managed to get my apartment clean, with the help of my Mom. My roomie could do a better job cleaning up after himself, but he tends to miss a lot of spot, since he's hardly able to see. Have to put forth an effort to help him clean better.

But enough of that. I got something in the mail today. My order from Lulu.com came in.

What did I order you ask?

Something very special to me.

You see I belong to a roleplaying community called The Gaming Guardians. It's one of the best communities for roleplay that I've ever found. The rp is based off of the webcomic of the same name, written by none other than graveyardgreg and drawn by a Wilson Trull. Well, after some trials and tribalations, Greg finally got his flagship comic published! The package is really great for a webcomic-to-print deal. It looks very attractive (yes, even though the print format is black and white), and captures the spirit of the webcomic very well. Greg was nice enough to list all of us in the community in the credits, for helping build the community at The Nice Forums.

So what can I say, other that I will continue to help make the place (which has become something of a haven for me) a great one. Kudos to you Greg.

The other book I got is "Southern Cross" by David Silver. It's the book about the history of Southern Cross, a Final Fantasy based Muck.  The same one a certain skunktaur hails from. (He takes the blame for getting me into it). From what I understand, he wrote it for NaNoWriMo a few years back and managed to get it published. I haven't read it yet, but as a player in the Muck (which is very cannily done and run), I can appreciate it just that much more. Plus I'm glad to support him in keeping it running smoothly.

So, I think that's enough shamelessly plugging for these guys. (hint, you can find them both at Lulu.com) But dammit, they deserve it. Anyone who can build up a whole community around their ideas (and one where the rpers don't suck no less) deserves it. Go give them a look.

If'n y'all have questions about either community, ask in the comments. I'll answer the best as I can.